“Beasties Gra”
By Gary Sohmers, 2017 copyright, All Rights Reserved
Chapter Two – Good Old Friend
The professional term among humans is schizophrenic, the combo of multiple personalities in a single person, but I believe that everyone probably has this affliction, so I think nothing of it happening to me. I accept that I now have some form of symbiotic relationship with an invading yet “cooperative” being, and by accepting this, I am able to accept so many other previous irrational beliefs. I am open-minded, but now my mind has been truly expanded.
My alter ego, who I refer to going forward as an impulse has attached his brain to mine using what he explains is his pidi, for personal information and data interface, and as best as I can understand is similar to a combo of our DNA and our brains. It appears its goal is to understand human emotions, something myself and so many others to continuously cause struggle.
Impulse has me in a state of wonder about it all in order to analyze my emotion “wonder,” and the chemical reactions to it. He does the same to numerous individual emotions as they are triggered to manifest and subside, to analyzing all in barely a moment’s time. Time seems to be standing still outside of myself but that would be impossible I think to myself. I am just a human and happened to be in this place at this time, as ignorant and unaware of reality as any human, feeling as emotionally insecure as any introverted human, helpless as any depressed member of a manipulated society. All instantly thought and felt at once.
Inside my current combined consciousness, I felt that this impulse was making me become secure in “who” I am supposed to be, that I had some sort of a collaborative mission and that all of my experiences and knowledge has led me to be able to handle this day at this event. My fear of failure was gone and my reason to try became clearer.
My irrational belief system seems to have been modified at a DNA level to the best of my thinking. All of my previously un-evolved fears seemed to have been removed and I was confident that the imaginary voice was not harmful, but an old friend.
All of this happening in a blink of an eye it seems as my eyes leave my phone, and the sounds of reality begin to return to my consciousness. Music, people, birds and I am again aware of reality but still somewhat controlled by my impulse not to move just yet as it seems to be using all of my senses to get acquainted with my exterior reality. If I’m not tripping than I am inhabited. Either way, I am now enjoying it.
Change happened.
An “epiphany” appears to have occurred.
My mind was now wide open.
My instincts kick in to do my job, triggering the impulse to allow me to stand up and head towards the rest of the crew all finishing up our breaks with the show about to begin. I took a few hits off a bowl as I observed the band’s roadies taking the stage and the audience flowing into the concert area. I took my position at the right-hand side of the stage near the monitor mix board ready to assist as needed.
Assuming everyone must hear at least one voice in their heads talking to them as they analyze and deduce, questioning and answering themselves in day to day decision making, could this impulse actually be another’s voice and not my own and how could anyone detect the difference. Free will to believe may be available, but the will to tell anyone else what we think might be an irrational question.
People need friends to share deep shit with, but I personally have always been an introverted loner forced into the spotlight, irrationally becoming addicted to narcissistic supply, having or keeping very few friends. A shift to acceptance has helped me accept the small fish in the big pond view of survival and enjoying life, and felt a true friendship to this impulse.
Impulse moves my hands and my eyes back to my mobile phone and begins flipping through looking for definitions of the words “love,” “hate,” “fear,” “happiness,” “empathy,” “apathy” and what appears to be hundreds more variations of the good and bad aspects of thought. All of these have always been confusing to me, so his investigation would help us both. These I assume were the deep subconscious issues that I have avoided all my life while I concentrate on career, money, mating, and ego, that were discovered and need understanding.
Since there was really nothing required of me to do at that moment, daydreaming did not seem to affect anyone. The impulse voice explained to me internally that from the perspective of the universe, or any other being on the planet that may be observing us from any viewpoint, we would have appeared in the past few moments bonding to have merely been a person looking at his phone. He explained that no human outside of us has any idea that an extraterrestrial being may be cohabitating my human body, mostly because of the closed mind of most individuals existing only in survival mode.
We turned our eyes away from the screen and began to observe all that surrounded us. My ongoing commentary from here might relate to “us” as opposed to me, as I now feel bonded, but at times may seem detached. Both are good for me and my impulse.
Some people were still scurrying about, adjusting cables on the ground and erecting decorative banners. The roadies and tech crew were preparing for the show to start placing the musical instruments on stage in their stands and testing the electrical connections, interacting with gestures and smiles.
I was thrilled to see such a large amount of attendees arriving for the concert, since the music and messages were good, and it was a free event. Most people were attending because they were familiar with the band and their newest album, a rock opera that the lead singer had written for the purpose of effecting change in mind and action about climate change and corporate corruption.
They attract an audience of like-minded fans and have become one of my favorites, having listened to all of their albums. The musical journey of the lead singer Voice, represented by his lyrics, somewhat mirrors my own emotional passage through my musical life. I am supposed to be here now my new partner assures me.
And I was not alarmed at that moment to discover that my symbiote ability to telepathically hear huge amounts of voices, and accept massive data input was not overwhelming to me. I was literally taking in the knowledge and emotional messages spewing out of the brains of thousands of people as they streamed towards the stage.
The general feeling of the audience we were receiving was “good vibes,” People had come to share the music, atmosphere and communal experience in an emotionally and mentally healthy natural state of relief and enjoyment. We aligned with the good vibe. As a duo, we were bonded securely internally. We now thought alike, “felt” similar and were unified, so he shared his goal with me to discover the reasons humans do not care deeply about the survival of the living planet that supports their existence.
Wow, a mission that I can assist with, and I don’t believe this is a hallucination. To accomplish this, I am told we must motivate.
Now it appears I am able to read minds, or telepathically communicate or whatever it is, I know what people are thinking, and I can see holograms and other bizarre things floating in the air, along with what I would previously have called imaginary creatures around each person. We were acknowledged by a few of my co-workers with a nod, a smile and/or a hand gesture, although they all seemed to be looking at us curiously, evidenced by these telepathic thoughts I was receiving. Not in a negative way, but emanating a sense of curious wonder. I belonged on the stage in my position and it was time.
The band took the stage as bands all do, with the musicians all plugging into their amps, taking their positions and testing their gear and the audience raising their voices in recognition. The band was made up of Vibe on lead guitar, Bill on keyboards and sax, Sid on drums and Radar on bass, plus they have added some backup singers for this show. I stood next to the monitor mix board with the techie in charge of the sound the musicians hear on stage, so I was able to see and hear everything going on.
Vibe begins the first song casually strumming the opening chords on his guitar, walking towards the front center of the stage as the audience response builds louder. The singer, songwriter, and leader of the group, Voice, slowly walked towards the center of the stage, adding to the strumming guitar sounds. The crowd starts to cheer, it grows louder, as the music intensity builds with the addition of other instruments creating a swell.
Vibe and Voice stroked their guitars doing an exaggerated proverbial guitar windmill with passion, determination, and finesse. As I stood on the side of the stage, enjoying the sounds of the guitars, my impulse causes me to emulate the swinging arm movements of the guitarist as he strummed his instrument. Swinging our arm in unison with the musicians’ movement, we are telepathically tapped into his head. And since the song was already imbedded in our knowledge from my recent obsession with the current record, I knew the melodies and lyrics like I had written them myself, like any fan. Voice had become my favorite poet.
Always believing that the message Voice conveys through his music and lyrics could change the world to a become better society, I sincerely felt that I was very lucky to have worked my way up through show biz, paid my dues and was able to be here now. Whether there was an alien inside me or controlling me, this was a special moment for me. Beyond show biz, Voice impressed me with his spirit, words, and desire to effect change, and I believed he spoke for us.
We are now compelled to be physically excited, emotionally compelled to smile and feel a sense of comfort in knowing the song and believing in the message the musical group conveys. Still standing off stage, but now in view of Voice and Vibe, we were unable to control our reaction to the music. Our body began to move rhythmically, and our senses were beginning to be consumed by all that surrounds us. Whether the acid trip was about to go bad, or was all part of the alien’s plan, I felt no inhibition because I knew my place.
We were reflectively strumming an imaginary guitar, mimicking the movements of Voice and Vibe onstage. It appeared as if the universe was aligned, ready for something magical to happen.
On Voice’s cue, the music came to a halt. He stood motionless at the front edge of the stage, poised with his right arm held high in the air, ready to take another swipe at the guitar, ready to create a big noise everyone was anticipating. There was a moment of silence. Everything appeared to stop. Even time appeared to stop. All of the humans, birds, and insects ceased all sounds. The atmosphere was still just for a moment. It appeared as though the entire universe took a breath.
The moment might have appeared microscopic in human terms, but my impulse and I were completely aware of the stillness. We scanned the mood of the crowd to take a proverbial temperature, and my impulse informed me that was so that if a change occurred it would be able to be scientifically supported. Our telepathic measurement received a unified hope in Voice’s messages to not just enjoy life, but to preserve the planet on which life exists.
In the moment of silence, impulse related that Earth is a living being itself, and needs only to be treated with respect by humans living on it, and that within this group amassed there appears to be the right group to effect global human change. Wow.
The next moment we felt Voice give a telepathic “shout out” to all within his mind’s eye, something only possibly learned from an ascended being somewhere during his evolution as he definitely was not being inhabited by a foreign impulse currently. The moment of serenity, Voice and Vibe stood motionless, with eyes closed, at the front of the stage, arms raised in the air, the quiet rush of wind blowing fabrics, blowing smells on the breezes, all of the human senses open and aware, ready for the next experience in life. The quiet slowly begins to dissipate as the audience becomes enthusiastic. The shouts and cheers begin, as the chemicals within their individual systems affect each in its own time and manner triggering mental and physical reactions to their emotional charges.
Upon cue from Voice, all of the musicians on stage attack their instruments like a rhythmic machine, a driving musical momentum engaging the audience to escalate their cheers and unify their movement. Physically I find the rhythm as infectious as the others, knowing the song by heart, I begin to move. As I dance, Voice senses our presence as we make eye contact, now reaching a deeper level of telepathic communication between us who both believe that telepathic communication is a scientific fact. Our minds were now aligned for direct communication, and with no resistance we danced towards Voice.
As we move towards the center of the stage, on the opposite side of the stage, I notice a beautiful girl dancing while painting a poster on an easel. At that moment his thoughts have moved from his message to his woman and we are tuned in. Her name is Terra. Uncanny that she is named the same as the planet. My new inner partner seems enamored with her, analyzing and learning about her as the music played. She appears to float on the stage swaying to the music, slowly painting an image of Earth from outer space.
Connecting with Terra seemed important to impulse, as if he had encountered her essence before and felt the basis for communicating was beyond human rituals. I attempted to mentally communicate with her telepathically, but she was so much farther into the depths of her own life that she did not respond. She did not appear unable or unwilling, her mind was truly open and there was nothing but positivity emanating.
What causes someone to do something for the first time, an experiment or life-changing first, an impulse that makes someone do something good, bad or unusual. At that moment, impulse moved me to a microphone, as I knew the lyrics were about to start. Voice acknowledged my presence at the mic with a smile as if he expected me.
The band changed gears and Voice allowed me to sing the first line of his first song, on this special day at this special event, so that all heard me, “Is this just an endless stream, another day get up and dream.” Was Voice in on my acid trip, was there an impulse in him also, or did he just go with the flow as I do. Our eye contact assures each of us that this is the way the flow goes.
With minimal resistance and concern, except maybe wonderment, Voice turned towards Terra and sang the next line of lyrics, “In decision, in despair, a romantic’s life is just not fair” as if this was all completely rehearsed in advance. Terra smiles at Voice. We sense minimal confusion in her mind with my presence singing his lines as if she assumed it was rehearsed without her and not her concern.
Voice looks to me, smiles as I sing the next line “why must this happen day in and day out?” directly from having listened to it numerous times driving in my car.
Voice’s attention continues on Terra as he sings to her “why must my hope always end up doubt? Is my fate just to be some unknown shroud.” And we sang the next words together to the audience echoing doubt “I’m not sure.”
Vibe stepped out front to join Voice as they again dramatically swiped their hands against their guitar’s strings adding the power chords that move the song to the chorus. These chords seemed to unify all of the minds, the bodies, the spirit and compelled me to sing the next line as an outsider attempting to understand another culture’s beliefs.
“If I could see what was wrong with you, I would understand.”
To which Voice responded, again towards Terra to make sure she understands that she is a priority, with the words he had written for this song and sung many times previously, “If I could see what was wrong with myself, I’d be more of a man.”
When his gaze moved away from Terra and towards the band, Voice and I made momentary eye contact and then we both turned to the audience. In a unified gesture, Voice and I sang together “If I could see what was wrong with this whole world, I would lend a helping hand.”
